Hey all.  Michael here.  You’ve heard it before, now here it again and brighten your day!

Hey all.  Michael here.  Well, sorry if the title confused you, but I haven’t seen it yet.  But, I will see it when it comes out, no matter if I have to drive to Orlando.  I <3 Bruce Campbell.  He is AWESOME!

This trailer is awesome, too.  Hail to the king, baby.  Shop Smart…shop S-Mart!

(Watch ARMY OF DARKNESS if you didn’t get those quotes…) 

Here it is!

(Oh, and apparently this is coming out around Halloween.  HELLOOOOOOOOOOO movie I am seeing on my anniversary!) 

Hey all.  Michael here.  So, this is the funniest thing I’ve seen this week.  So, maybe it will be yours, too.

Hey all.  Michael here.  This may come as a shock, but I am divorcing Heather.

Why, you ask?  Well, I found the love of my life on HurryDate.com!

Her name is Trenita.  Watch her video and see why I fell in love!

Hey all.  Michael here.  Long title.  Pretty much sums up the story…but…you know how I roll…

I am just curious about this because I know I’ve heard of people going to jail or being prosecuted for killing or injuring police dogs and horses and whatnot.  If you can get in trouble for doing that to a police “officer”, does euthanization mean that you are assisting in suicide?  Of course, unless you are Dr. Doolittle, you can’t talk to the animals, so how do you know?  Because the vet says so?  What if this vet gets his jollies from killing animals?  What then?  Huh, huh?!?

Read more here.

Hey all.  Michael here.  This is pretty awesome video of an iron ball falling into a flat bed of sand in slow motion.  Pretty freaking cool if you ask me.

Hey all. Michael here. So, four of five members of the Indian River County School Board voted to give the new superintendent, Harry La Cava, $134,000 for 140 sick days that he earned while working in Broward County. The problem with this? The guy is obviously a moron because he didn’t check to see before he RESIGNED from Broward and took the job in Indian River that the sick days do not get paid out unless you RETIRE from Broward. And, he stupidly didn’t get it included in his original contract.

So, because he is a moron and realized what he did after the fact, he told IRCSB that he wanted to be paid for them.

So, what do these elected officials do?  The right thing and say, “Sorry, but you earned those there.  We are not going to pay you $134,000 because you failed to check on the policy before you left.  We are having to cut the budget as is to try and make it in this county, and teachers are already not getting raises.”

No, friends.  We live in Indian River County.  Of course they approved it.  The only one that voted against it was Debbie MacKay.

So, I ask that if you live in Indian River County, or you know anyone that does, please do not re-elect Karen Disney-Brombach, Leonora Quimby, Carol Johnson, and Ann Reuter.  Here is a link to their profiles on the IRCSB site here.  The only ones up for re-election this year are Leonora Quimby and Ann Reuter, but keep the others in mind for future reference.

Read more of this atrocity here.

Hey all.  Michael here.  What is up with all the birth defects in India?  I mean, I am sure it is due to the statistics of them having almost as many, and soon more, people than China.  But, first the eight-limbed girl, now this?!?

INSANE!

Hey all.  Michael here.  So, I was thinking to myself, “Self, what can your wonderful readers get you for Christmas this year?”  And, my answer was this.  So, you are welcome for me doing the thinking for you. 

Hey all.  Michael here.  Well, these dumb chicks that decided to all get knocked up so their kids could hang out together and their parents and the fucking media, of course, are blaming, among other things, JUNO for popularizing teen pregnancy.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for having sex with 14-year-old girls, but…these girls are nucking futs.

Well, Jason Bateman, who was in JUNO, has a different take on who might be responsible for glamorizing teen pregnancy…

ZOEY 101, anyone?  Click here.